An Open Letter to my wife…..

<Normally, open letters are never read by the meant recipient. I am trying to change that. BTW this is not a cheesy love letter! >

May 16^th 2013 is our Second Marriage anniversary. Staying apart for two years after Marriage was not only difficult but also expensive. It was only in December that we actually started living together and that was the end of my bachelorhood. No more careless living for me!

Living with one of your friend is a good experience. But I forgot that a friend is different from a wife…….

We had a house of our own for first time and we decided to decorate it. Here comes the change. Obviously as a self-respecting woman like you have opinions about everything I do!  And supposedly my tastes are poor! 

Soon I learned how dirty I am, and raising the toilet seat is more important than using the toilet, itself! I also realized that one towel is  not enough to clean myself. I need one towel for my hair, one for my face and one for rest of my body.

As a married man you lose many freedoms. Freedom to fart freely and unhindered is the most I miss. (BTW women fart too!)

Marriage changes the type of movies you see. The definition of 'classics' for Girls are very different from 'classics' for men. I soon found out  ‘Sex and the City’ and  ‘Pretty Woman’ are classics and I should watch them without questioning any logic. And the movies I mostly see are noir and stupid!

Marriage also changed my perception towards television. 'The Bachelor', for me was just one of the stupid reality shows. But after seeing hot girls in skimpy bikinis fighting for a guy, really opened my eyes! Television is simply wonderful. I have faith in humanity now.

I thank my YOU for that!

I started liking ‘Runway’, ‘Flea Market Flip’, ‘Meet the Kardashians’ and ‘Real Housewives of Beverly Hills’.

‘BBC World’, ‘National Geographic’, ‘Discovery Channel’ and ‘Top Gear’ are stupid and meaningless channels.
I also realize that I would not get to touch the remote control unless it is far, somewhere out of your reach !

Another thing that I lost was freedom to sleep in peace (no double entendre here!). I have to be a ninja even when I sleep. Knees in the ribcage, slap in my face are a common occurrence. I expect to be pushed off the bed anytime during the night.  Might be you have a anger in  back your mind and starve to take revenge!

I also realize that having you sitting besides me while I drive, is so important. Without your 'side-seat driving advise', I would be a dead driver. You are the one to keep me alive at every nook and corner of the dangerous streets (all the streets)!

I would also like to thank you for  bearing with my 'good' habbits:

- I realize at times I crack 'crude-non-veg' jokes which would offend any living person but 'once' you took it lightly.

 - I would also advice new grooms that jokes on in-laws are strict NO-NO.

-Snoring is inherent to male population. You are so lucky to experience it!

-Thanks for keeping up  with my spending habits. This explains why you are way richer than me!

- I also realize that I am intruding in your domain by cooking awesome food! Sorry for that!

- It took me two years to learn your last name! Sorry for that again but its not my fault!

Finally , I would not thank you for $2000 'Point and shoot' Camera, You know how crazy I am

Happy Second Anniversary!
~Adi